Tea Time in Wonderland

I had been flooded on Twitter and Facebook with notes about the Icecreamists. They’re opening! The flavours a soooo out of this world! You won’t believe your tastebuds! I read about absinth ice cream, cryogenic cocktails… I really wondered what the Obamama flavour would be like.

Licking my lips, I pocket the VIP invitation for the opening. I get there in advance but people are already getting in. Ah! But nobody’s checking the guest names. A few shoppers join in, try their luck, get in. So much for the VIP effect.

The decoration is entirely back with touches of neon pink. Gothic-Kitsch! An excellent group sings some vintage Prince which makes me think this is going to be heavenly. In a corner stands a customised ice-cream van: black and pink again, the Queen driving, a reference to Banksy. God save the Cream!

I’m given a menu, brought to a table, explained I can ask for samples if I cannot choose. I look at the prices: the Sex Pistols cocktail is at a mere £19…! Gosh, your appetite curbs down immediately. Normal ice-cream portions are at £3.99. You have to pay for the opening party? No indication.

The waitress takes my order. She can’t hear me and I try to scream over the music. My portion arrives in a design glossy black pot. Is lready melting and dripping on the side. Flavour like, it’s quite nice, sorbet like, very soft, very sugary. Not extra-ordinary. I step to the counter, I’m curious abour the bread one. Oh, and the rose too. Oh, and the sex pistols exists as an ice-cream, not just in a cocktail? I wait and wait, being ignored. An exhausted waitress finally telle me, a touch unnerved, that they don’t do samples anymore. She does not propose a second ice-cream either.

End of the game for me. Waitresses do not ask for any feedback. Anyway, they had already given my table to someone else. Noone seems to care about people leaving. We don’t even get a good-bye. That’s an opening party?!

Verdict?
The theory was good. Vice-creams, ice-cream boutique. Molecular ice-creams. It sounded really good. The deco has been worked on.
But prices? You come here to impress a lover, that’s quite an expensive stop for two cocktails…
Ignoring people on your first day is not the best idea either. On that day… they’re your best friends.
The ice creams are good. But… those are all big names hiding, most often, a simple flavour. Obamama? Milk chocolate with a hint of salt. I’d rather have a little name but a big flavour.

In a nutshell: a trendy place -  you come here to be seen, to know the cool places, to have tried the different ice cream, the ones seen in the magazines. I’m not sure what the Sex Pistols would say, but I’d go for the Rolling Stones “I can’t get no satisfaction”.

Want some cool ice-cream?
- For the same price, head for Freggo and try the dulce or even the Malbec and berries… The deco also plays a glamour note.
- Grab a nectarine one @ Gelato Mio (2.50) close to Embankment and sit in the sun in the Embankment gardens…
- Try the kiwi ice-cream at Scoop (£2) then head for Covent Garden…
- Finish with a sesameor chestnut ice-cream (£3.50) @ Feng Sushi after a stroll on South Bank

The Icecreamists
Selfridges
The Ultralounge
400 Oxford St
London, W1A1AB

Tube: Bond St

2 Responses to “Don’t scream for the Icecreamists ”